Couldn’t I Just Hire My Niece To Draw A Picture Of Me?

Thu, Apr 3, 2008

RanDUMB

I need a headshot for an upcoming side project that is in fact kinda related to home improvement. I haven’t had time to take any pictures what with fumbling in the dark in Vermont, sitting on trains, working, throwing back cocktails, meeting with the slipcover lady, etc. You see the schedule is just full-full-full. I even double booked tonight. The Fiance bought tickets to see Chicago on Broadway and I told the girls at work that tonight would be a grand night to go out and tie one on. Oops. The Fiance has a friend in town this week so the friend’ll get dragged to the show and I’m going to go drink beer and eat frito pies with the co-workers. So anyway, this morning the Fiance set up the camera and a backdrop and took over 100 pictures. THEY ALL SUCK. Apparently I said to him “please take the pictures really close up so that everyone can be sure to see the slack in my skin, the double chin, the gaps in my teeth and the crows feet that are scratching their way across my eyes. Didn’t he realize that I need the Cybill Shepherd treatment where it’s all gauzy and diffused looking? I mean if he loved me, really loved me he could have scraped 40 pounds off these pics, right? Ugh. Sadly, these are the best. Which means I will be taking pictures of myself tonight…half in the bag after a night out with the girls…

I know how to laugh. I laugh a lot. I look TERRIBLE when I smile or laugh in pictures. My lips get all contorted and my teeth look weird. But I don’t want to not smile – cause then I just looked pissed off. Grrrr.

From Rechelle: I think the picture in the middle row on the left looks cute, a tad hostile, but cute.

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9 Comments For This Post

  1. LadyCiani Says:

    I like the lower right, with the paint chips! You look a little mischievous, and a teensy bit like you’re hiding, but if it’s going to be a DIY type promo, I think it fits well!

  2. dynochick (Jan) Says:

    I agree, I like the photo with the paint chips. It says….”when I’m not decorating, painting, or building benches…..I’m a fan dancer.”

    I’d rather have my fingernails pulled out than have my photo taken. Hence…no photo of me on my blog. My security card at work is so old the photo doesn’t even look like me. But there’s no way in the world I am letting those hacks take a photo that I have to have attached to my person, 56 hrs a week, for everyone to see. I might as well say “Want a good laugh, check this out.”

    I vote for paint chip photo. Oh that’s right…we’re not voting. Nevermind.

  3. iloveupstate.com Says:

    I was thinking it might be cool to put them ALL in sort of a “yes I’m a dork and I enjoy watching The Brady Bunch” cube kind of look. Hah!

    Or, I could just do one of my non-smile looks and write “Dork” on my forehead. That’d work too.

  4. Marilyn Says:

    I say use your ILU new-haircut pic and let them crop around it – you look so fierce in that one. It says “good taste and ass-kicking, right here!”

    But keep the whatever that lipstick is in the head shots – Mac, perhaps?

  5. iloveupstate.com Says:

    I own about 20 lipsticks…and that one was the cheapest and my most favorite. It’s “terra cotta” from Jordana. Yep, a whopping $1. I ran out about a year ago and freaked out when I thought it had been discontinued…I finally found some after hitting 5-6 pharmacies.

  6. Elaine the Pain Says:

    I like the top left one. You look like my sister in it, but nicer! hahahaha

  7. iloveupstate.com Says:

    Elaine THE PAIN…

    Half of your daughter’s birthday present is upstairs in my closet. I’ll ask Mom to grab it if I can ever get her on the phone…

  8. EGE Says:

    You look like someone I’d be honored to drink beers with.

    Oh, and Johnny peeked over my shoulder at these pictures, and he said: “She looks like a lunatic [that's his way of saying he'd be honored on the beer thing, too]. But she looks like she’s only in her thirties.”

    “She is,” says I.

    “Well, she’s doing all right, then!”

  9. Bryna Says:

    I like the one with the paint chips…know what you mean about trying to get a decent picture…hugs

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